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Submitted on
June 6, 2013
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9,481
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Did anyone notice that she winced if you raised your arm?
Did anyone notice that her eyes were wide with alarm?
Did anyone notice that she never looked you in the eye?
Did anyone notice that her voice was but a sigh?
Did anyone notice that her skin was always bruised?
Did anyone question whether she might be abused?
Did anyone question why she walked in obvious fear?
Did anyone question why one day she did not appear?
Did anyone recognize her face on the six-o’clock news?
Did anyone see her remains pulled from the river refuse?
Did anyone care that this quiet girl no longer exists?
No.  No one did. And she will never even be missed.
R.I.P.
Sometimes the invisible is in plain sight.


THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH FOR ALL THE FAVS :heart: - I CAN'T THANK YOU ALL BECAUSE I'VE THANKED SO MANY DA THINKS I AM SPAMMING!! :laughing: :heart:
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:iconinvader-chirin:
Critique by Invader-Chirin Jun 7, 2013, 7:35:30 AM
This shows the problems right in front of our faces that few kids and friends are aware of, even though it happens everyday. I think this- this poem? shows them what's truly happening out in the real world. Abuse needs to be brought to attention and this is the perfect way to do it. Now some deviants will actually try to take a stand against a normally unknown issue. Most people make characters like this and games and tease, but they don't realize it's happening. This, in all it's glory, has made me realize it's not funny or cool. It's real, it's scary, and it's deadly. Thanks for addressing this issue in such a serious manner. I think the impact needs more stars than that but
wow
I'm just blown away by this
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
84 out of 84 deviants thought this was fair.

:iconsolyme:
You chose a hard subject, and the best thing about this piece is that you made it both respectful and accusing. And you managed to keep the over-the-top drama out of this.

I especially like the « quiet » girl part - it's true that we tend to see very few people in a group. And they do say the quiet ones do have their own stories to share.

As for the visual effect, I quite like it: always starting with « did anyone » emphasizes the fact it is an all known situation, more common than we'd like, but all the same never seen soon enough by those who can help. Always the same questions, always the same story, and still, it happens.
I would say you could have work a bit more with the third word of each line ( 5 notice, 3 question and then?) so as to create even more of a pattern or progression.

Overall, a very nice work :)
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
25 out of 25 deviants thought this was fair.

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:iconsparksshadow:
SparksShadow Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I love this and everything about it, good job! 
Reply
:iconinsanityadjuster:
InsanityAdjuster Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you :)
Reply
:iconmanip-maker:
Manip-Maker Featured By Owner Sep 19, 2013
So beautiful, and very close to home for me...
Reply
:iconinsanityadjuster:
InsanityAdjuster Featured By Owner Sep 20, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:tighthug:
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:iconmanip-maker:
Manip-Maker Featured By Owner Sep 20, 2013
<3
Reply
:iconwhatsthatagain:
WhatsThatAgain Featured By Owner Jul 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Awesome! You managed to carry some powerful emotions in this short piece of text, keep it up! :)
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:iconinsanityadjuster:
InsanityAdjuster Featured By Owner Jul 2, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you so much :D
Reply
:iconicecrystall:
IceCrystall Featured By Owner Jun 18, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
I Liked It But It Was Sad
Reply
:iconinsanityadjuster:
InsanityAdjuster Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
It is meant to be sad :heart:
Reply
:icon13devilgirl13:
13devilgirl13 Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This is great work, so sad, but at the same time so great.
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